On Moving On

How long should we move on?

As long as it takes to let the pain let go of you first.


People call out other people’s mistake of not being able to move on quickly and telling them that it’s going to be too late for them to find another partner if they waste their time in having their alone time, moving on. Some people say that strong persons are quick to move on and face the world with a smile after a week or a month. But for me, those persons who take their time and asses what really happened and slowly take those steps into rebuilding themselves on what they might have lost are the strongest. Why am I discussing this? I am not coming from a broken relationship and moving on. I am thinking of what I might have become if I pursued my plan of breaking up with my long term boyfriend before leaving the Philippines. I was 22 and hormones were kicking in.  I might have tried to commit suicide the moment I stepped on the plane. Kidding. That’s gruesome. But the effect on me might have been catastrophic.

When I was in my early teens, I tend to stop reminding myself that I am on the process of moving on and just enjoy what I’m doing with life. I was in my teens, I don’t give a fuck what my parents would say and why would I let them know in the first place. So I go through crying, calling the boy back, wanting to get back together but after all these routine, and it ends there.

But now that I am weeks away from turning 25, I always aim in getting better everyday and not linger with what happened yesterday or the previous weeks. Although, I am moving on from other heartaches that I experienced in the past weeks, I tend to linger a little and enjoy the loneliness it causes. For in loneliness and pain comes the spark of happiness and joy.

Sincerely sadistic to self,

Iya Rai



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