Tear Vomit

I wish I could become a better a person who will inspire him but I just can’t seem to be that person. I just keep on disappointing him with my expectations. I am making him feel bad every time and question why we’re still together despite all the wrong things I did to him.

Should I let him go for him to be happy?

He didn’t send me a single text message today. I know he’s pissed off but it’s not like him.. He can’t resist me. But somehow he can now..and it’s hurting me.

I sent him a goodnight message, asking if he still wants to be with me. If he doesn’t he must tell me now so that I could make arrangements for my vacation. And if he still wants to see me.

I don’t feel him around any more. I can’t understand him lately. We’re not talking that much as well. He even told me that it was a choice I made two years ago to go away like it’s my fault that I am hurting that I’m away from him. He said that he didn’t mean to say that I’m at fault but it was a part of that decision I did years ago.

I don’t know any more. I wanted to be with him but I wanted to stay here too because of the job opportunity.

It hurts so bad I can’t cry any more.

I just want him to come after me.

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